Barbara Bowman and Janice Dickinson

I watched both Barbara Bowman and Janice Dickinson (see here) speak out about their story of rape by Bill Cosby.

I believe them.

They are telling the truth without a doubt. Both women show palpable disgust when recollecting or talking about Bill Cosby. Their stories flow. They both express deep pain on their faces that anyone can see. And their stories are eerily similar. And there aren’t just two accusers. The list is up over a dozen now.

Many people wonder why they didn’t come forward long ago when this originally happened, and I don’t think people realize the multitude of factors that came into play for these women.

First, rape is a very hard topic to broach with a stranger–especially if you are young woman trying to find your place in this world.

Second, you have to realize that these women didn’t wake up knowing they had been drugged or raped.  They woke up in a blur, had a fuzzy head, and had to be unsure of what had transpired.

They had to wonder:  Did I fall asleep?  Did I drink to much?  Did I pass out from something?  Did I eat something funny?

Most people don’t automatically wake up and say, “Hey I was drugged and oh, yeah, wow: Raped.”  It’s hard to believe someone would actually violate another person–especially someone you looked up to.

These women woke up in a state of bewilderment and had to pick up and carry on with life, and in the middle of it try to figure out what happened.

That takes time to figure out and process that someone violated you–not in one way, but two.  The shock and denial can cause people to push it away. It’s a painful realization that they lost lost control somehow.  That they were violated.

Also, when people are sedated, they are not in any position to take a stand, stand their moral ground or fight anyone, but its hard to rationalize that–that they did something that they didn’t want to do, regardless.  How could that happen?

People in this situation will become overrun with feelings of incredible guilt and shame, feelings of responsibility, even when they had none, and can’t be held culpable in anyway.  They don’t realize the psychological effects of these drugs. They will literally battle themselves thinking, “Why didn’t I fight back?  What was wrong with me?  That was sick!”  They will viscerally want to hide.  They will feel repulsed.

They also will begin to feel that people won’t believe them because they didn’t fight back in their unaware drugged state.  They will fear that people will blame them, tell them they wanted it or they would have fought back. Then they will start to hate themselves for not fighting back, and feel more and more insecure because they didn’t, which causes them to bury everything and try to push it away, instead of deal with it head on.  They go into a tailspin of negativity, and this will erode their chances of ever speaking about it to anyone.

Now imagine processing all of this and trying to understand it, and you must figure it all out before the drugs (or DNA) leave your system.  Figuring something like this out could take weeks or even months to mentally sort through, and by then the evidence has cleared the body.  It’s gone forever.

Then, they don’t just have to say some strange guy did this to me, if they figure it out. No, they have to point to a beloved, trusted, highly regarded mega star, and say he did it!  They have to accuse America’s favorite and most trusted Dad.

Imagine for just a minute how hard that would be.

I don’t think we are giving these women near enough space considering what happened.  This would be hard for the most mature, self-assured middle age woman, let alone someone newly starting their career.

And Barbara Bowman found amazing courage to tell people what happened. She went to her agent and spoke out, and to an attorney, and both refused to take her seriously. I believe it.

Think about why this would happen.

If the agent or the attorney weren’t powerhouses themselves, going forward against a mega star was also risky for their careers. If they came forward to support Barbara publicly and the case was rejected to do lack of evidence (rape is very hard to prosecute without evidence), these professionals risked having their reputations put into the same category as Barbara. They could easily be labeled as not credible, troublemakers, or foolish themselves for questioning such a loved mega role model like Bill Cosby.  After all he was America’s most wanted Dad.

Speaking about Bill Cosby wasn’t just risky for these women. It was risky for others, too. It could have truly killed or disabled their careers and tarnished their reputations, too, and these people knew it. That’s why they likely didn’t take Barbara’s situation on and go forward.  Because the risk was high for them, too.  They too stepped away in the shadows.

I feel for these women. This was a very traumatic experience where they were forced to carry the burdens quietly themselves for years.  I wonder if they can ban together and sue Cosby in civil court.  He needs to face up to this and deal with it once and for all, and stop trying to sweep it under the carpet.

I hope more women get the courage to speak out. It will only empower them now.  As they gain numbers, the power will be given back to them and the one who caused all this pain will stand farther and farther alone and in the corner of shame he so deserves.

Bill Cosby: Rape Accusations

Have you read the news about the women accusing Bill Cosby of drugging and raping them? This isn’t the first time this has made the news and went silent again. Back in 2006, Andrea Constand went after Bill Cosby for rape in the courts, and there were 13 victims called to the stand (source). One of them was Barbara Bowman who has been talking about it more and more, and now today another woman, journalist Joan Tarshis, has come forward and said her story matches those of the other women.

When multiple people are coming forward with a similar story, and Bill Cosby refuses to say one word when asked in an interview, I am very suspicious.

Listen to Cosby being questioned this past weekend.  Here is  link.

Bill Cosby had power and influence with his status, and has done everything he can to keep this quiet instead of dealing with it head-on and directly. And so far it has worked. It has continually gone away, over and over again.  But is this the right thing to do?

I say no.  If he is honest and forthright, and being wrongly accused, he should be mad.  He should be upset, but clearly he isn’t.  Oh no, he’s much happier being quiet and that raises my eyebrows up and high.

Add to that–that this is not one accuser, or two accusers, oh no. It appears to be over a dozen, and that’s too many for a fluke or a coincidence for me.

I think it is time we stand together as a people and demand a response or stop supporting him. These are too many allegations to get swept under the carpet again!

I stand beside these women. There are too many of them for this to be a lie.

 

Fake Crying

On Dr. Phil this week, if you watched it, you got to see a really good example of a fake cry. This example hit every marker there is.

If you’ve attended my classes, test your skills to see if you can articulate all the clues that this is not genuine! Good luck!

The McStay Murders

Many people wonder what I think of the recent developments in the case of the McStay family murders. We have video footage of Chase Merritt speaking to CNN as well as other footage of family members, etc.

When I watch Chase Merritt speak, from the interviews I’ve seen on CNN last night, I can say that I do not see anything that sets me off as “hot” regarding deception.  He actually says a couple of things that lean towards honesty in these videos. He says and does things that are more consistent with honesty than deception, though I have chosen to remain neutral on him.  I remain neutral when I don’t believe I have strong enough behavioral evidence to be conclusive from what I have seen.  With that, if people have interviews of Chase Merritt that they believe reveal hot spots, please post links to them below with time markers and I will look at them.

I want to clarify that I saw Chase in the interview on CNN in Buried Secrets: Who Murdered the McStay Family.  I missed the first 15 minutes of the show, but saw the rest of it. I tried to find links to the show in full this morning, but was unable to. I wanted to watch the first 15 minutes I missed.

There is a person in this case, however, that deeply troubles me in this investigation, and it is Michael McStay, the brother Joseph McStay, who was murdered along with his family.  He has pinged me in every single interview he has done to date.

Michael McStay concerns me on multiple levels.

Chase Merritt was the one who pointed out that the family seemed to be missing, and it was Michael who just wrote it off and ignored it.  Merritt kept asking the family to stop by, to take a look and to take it seriously, and it took Michael 9 days to get to his brother’s house. Michael said he just believed his brother and family were on vacation, and yet the dogs were left outside with no food or water?  How does that make sense?

I am troubled by how Michael behaves in the interview with Tim Miller from Equusearch when they first searched the house.  He shows no concern whatsoever when strangers seem to know something is very off. Michael McStay laughs and jokes as if all is well–very odd.  Michael says very boldly, “The detectives told me this is not a crime scene and I can do whatever I want to.”  His statement there is so full of arrogance and lack of concern for his brother that it is staggering. If you found food rotting on the counters and it appeared your family left quickly, wouldn’t you want to treat everything as a crime scene to preserve evidence?  Why didn’t Michael?

How could have been sure it wasn’t a crime scene?  It defies logic.

In the video inside the McStay house with Tim Miller, someone off film says to Michael, “They didn’t get abducted or forcibly removed from the house…” and Michael responds “No, well no,  …no, somebody could have said hey man, just like happened before Chase said ‘oh my shop got broken into, I can’t finish your jobs, I’ve got thousands of dollars to get out”…it could have been, ‘hey Joe, I’m coming over, I’m almost there, I’m almost there’, he got five calls…uh, ‘hey, I’m here, I’ll meet you at the bank or whatever’. My brother was going to give him money again, who knows, it could have been that….I…that’s….a possibility, too.  But I can tell you one thing, they got pulled away from the house by somebody that was comfortable to them.”

I find it odd that Michael immediately points the finger towards Chase so early on. If he was suspicious of Chase, why didn’t he wonder why his brother and his family were gone for 9 days? Why didn’t he respond to Chase’s earlier phone calls the day after Chase was suspicious something went wrong? Chase had to call Michael’s mom to get Michael to come out. These seem inconsistent to me. In that entire video, Micheal’s demeanor and behavior is off.

When the bodies of the McStay family were found in November 2013, we see Michael again acting odd. You can read my post here.  He is crying tears, but shows every indication his crying is fake.  And worse, he says at the end of his speech which is riddled with oddities and extreme discomfort, “I know everyone in America loves the McStays, and we’re going to find this individual…or individuals…I know the sheriffs, the FBI, ….everybody wants to bring this to justice, and if its the last thing I do, I just…..I just wanna know, you know… when its over (laugh).”  He then buries his face!! He comes back up to the microphone and says, “That’s all” as he gives an expression of contempt.

Really? 

What is making him laugh?  It’s not nervous laughter in the slightest.  He finds something funny and he wants to hide it in nearly every interview we see of him. It doesn’t add up at all. Is he hiding a huge whopper?  It sure makes you think.  Add to this, he went into his brothers house multiple times because the police didn’t make it a crime scene, and he freely admits he took his brother’s computer, too.  Why was his brother’s computer of interest to him, if it wasn’t of interest to the police? And he asked that if anyone found any secure digital cards from his sister-in-laws camera lying around the house to give them directly to him.  I found that very odd.

In that post above when the McStay’s bodies were found, I also mention that I happened upon a statement by Michael McStay reported by People Magazine in 2010 where Michael was quoted as saying, “My fear is that I’m looking for two adult shallow graves and … my two nephews’ crosses.”

WHAT??  What the hell is going on?  He seems to have predicted how we’d find his relatives to a tee — three years before they were found. How does this happen?  This is no coincidence.

And last, after hearing that Chase Merritt has been arrest, Michael McStay’s behavior clearly jumps out at me again.  Look at this video below at the six minute time marker.

Watch as Michael walks to the microphone–he has to hide his face!! Why?

Because his emotions are flat out inappropriate. He is holding back laughter again. He starts out by saying, “I said I wasn’t going to cry (smiling the whole time) but um, they did a great job.”

Michael is TRYING TO ACT sad, but he cannot pull it off.  There are no scientific markers of sadness whatsoever.  Instead, he keeps trying to shake off his happiness and shows lots of signs of discomfort doing so.  I have no doubt that Michael is faking his emotions here, and why in the world would he have to fake his emotions unless he feels differently?

People are pointing the motive of jealousy with Merritt. The one I have to wonder about who might have been jealous is Michael.

While I am open to continue exploring this case through behavioral evidence and interviews, I cannot get Michael McStay out of my mind. He is haunting, to say the least.  He is hiding something and it doesn’t make me feel good on any level.

Remember Shanesha Taylor?

In July, I wrote about Shanesha Taylor. She was a mom who left her two young children in the car when she went for a job interview in Arizona on an 83 degree day. People found her children and called for help. Shanesha was arrested.

When Shanesha’s mugshot got into the press, her tears caused a strong reaction from the public. People ended up donating more than $115K in donations (source). They believed Shanesha deserved a second chance and the prosecutor in this case gave it to her.

The court took her apology and desire for a second chance and said that she must deposit $60K into a trust fund account for the children by a certain date.

I didn’t believe Shanesha was sincere at all and wrote about it in July. You can read my thoughts here.

As suspected, Shanesha didn’t put any money aside for her kids, and when asked for show proof that she still had the funds, she was unable to do so.

She is now facing child abuse charges for leaving her kids unattended in the car, and will be tried in December!

I am all about giving people a second chance, but this woman was way to flippant in the media to deserve it, and I suspect prosecutors watched closely as well and weren’t about to let her slip through the cracks!

Dateline: Secret Lives

Did you catch Dateline this past weekend?   They profiled the story of Jennifer and Ganesh Ramsaran.  Jennifer went missing two weeks before Christmas in 2012.  Her body was found several months later along side the road.

I remember when this case was active and Ganesh was talking to the media. I found his interviews very challenging to review.  In one review, I wrote, “I see nothing positive or negative in this video upon which to draw conclusions outside of his “happy demeanor” which is odd.”  And another video I didn’t see any flags. I wasn’t comfortable saying I trusted him or distrusted him. I remained neutral on the sideline.  He was definitely a hard read in those media interviews he did, and I think he was challenging on Dateline, too.

Dateline gave us more footage of Ganesh, and I now have a strong opinion having watched him.

Before I share it with you, what did you think when you watched Ganesh?

Roofing Quote: Can you spot what’s off?

Our roof is approaching 20 years in age, and doesn’t look like it is going to make it much longer. We started calling contractors, my husband and I, about eight weeks ago. It turns out this seasons roofers are hard to come by. You see in Chicagoland it rained all of June, and all the workers are behind with more work than have time to do before the freeze sets in. Most roofers that we called didn’t even call us back. But a few smart ones came out and said they could take the work next spring.

The first quote was abysmally high. I tossed it immediately. The second and only other quote that came in, well, it too was high too. I am convinced work is so abundant that they are quoting people high numbers now because, well, if it comes it, its a boon for them! I don’t think they care if they don’t get more contracts right now. Not lucky for me. That’s for sure!

Anyway, the second contractor sent out a nice looking young guy to quote us. He’s actually the owner I found out.

We had a nice conversation, but unfortunately when he came to do the quote, it was pouring rain. We ran from overhang to overhang and around the house, and he politely asked if he could come back another time. I was happy to oblige because I didn’t want him crawling on a steep wet roof, and he wasn’t any more anxious to take undue risks himself.

He came out again late last week to finally climb on the roof. He was friendly as always, grabbed his ladder and went to work. He measured, inspected, and measured some more. He spent about 15 minutes in total checking measurements. Then he kindly swept off some leaves from the an area that commonly collects them on the roof. Certainly a nice gesture.

When he climbed down the ladder, he said he needed about 15 more minutes to go do the calculations for the quote. He said he would quickly do them in his truck and bring them to me. I offered to meet him at his truck in 15 minutes. When we met, he pulled out his quote and we talked about it. He told me if I wanted different shingles, there would be an up charge and he priced the garage out separately for me as asked.

He then handed me the quote in a nice yellow folder with a sticker on top identifying his company. He was very professional, very approachable and likeable. We shook hands and he left.

I am putting a link to a quote here from another roofing company.  This is not the company who quoted me, but so you can see a quote. My quote for all important purposes looked identical to this.

Something felt off though, after he left, but I couldn’t put my finger on it.

About an hour later, it hit me like a brick.

Can you tell what it is?

Christina Morris

Link to Video

Christina Morris went missing two months ago in Texas and the last person she was seen with was Enrique Arochi, an acquaintance, at 4 a.m. in a parking garage. Arochi says, “So we walked and we split and after I saw my car, I went to my car. I don’t know where she went, or if she went to her car. I just went to my car and left.” Arochi doesn’t remember parting words, or if Morris got to her car. This is certainly a red flag. Furthermore, he is very intensely focused and concentrating in this video so much so that you can’t miss it. Why does he feel he has to do that? Why isn’t he himself? He is absolutely deadpanning his emotions too, which is a flag. He shows no stress or any emotions, except a slight positive glow. I am troubled that he shows no concern whatsoever, or lack of regret that he didn’t walk her to her car or look after her. This video is enough to cause me to want to see more of Arochi. If anyone sees him talk again, please provide me with a link.