You can’t tell your friends …

…you’re a lie detector!

I’m been so excited about my epiphany since October that I couldn’t hold it in anymore and I had to tell a few people that guess what — I finally figured out that I can see lies. I think I am a human lie detector.

Don’t laugh!

I did try to phrase it a little more tactful.

I left off the last sentence that says I’m a human lie detector. Yes, that’s way too tacky. Instead, I started out more scientifically that I discovered this article, and with that, I think I may be one of these people…

Fair enough?

The first person I told was my best friend from blanketty-blank. I choose to tell her because she has a good vision — the best vision and ability to read people of anyone I have met in my life so I thought she would understand. I thought she could relate to me to some degree. What I underestimated however is that she is an insecure person under her tough exterior and as soon as I told her — the conversation ended within two minutes.

Yes, I am dead serious. It ended abruptly.

I remember standing there a few weeks ago, holding the phone in my hand listening to the dial tone wondering….what happened? I told her, and here I am…listening to dial tone after a long conversation. We had a long conversation. Some twenty minutes. It was flowing wonderfully until I spoke up. Then it ended quickly.

In hindsight, I could feel her wheels spinning. My friends lies to me a lot about unimportant things (her happiness when she’s not, etc)…but most people do. I don’t judged her for it. I don’t judge most people when I see the source is insecurity and the target isn’t me– but rather more about themselves. It’s easy to let these lies go…

My friend, however, still became overwhelmed thinking about me seeing her lies. She became a shrinking violet on the phone and withered away like a wilting flower.

How sad.

I like her.

A lot.

I respect her even though we are in very different places in life. She has a great heart and she is a good person.

Normally, my friend would have just teased me and told me that I was nuts if she didn’t see what I was saying. She always did that if she thought I was off my rocker. If she did that, I would have let it go and let it go quickly.

I so want to share my excitement and enthusiasm but I guess I can’t. People don’t get joy in what I love to do — in what I am extraordinary skilled at. It’s a big contradiction for me and them. It isn’t about fun, for them. It’s about painful realities. I have to remember this…

Now I wonder if I will hear from her again. Will she’ll stay wilted with regard to me — or will she snap out of it and forget about it?

Hopefully she will just convince herself I am a nut job – and we’ll be fine again. I don’t ever have to mention it again. It’s obvious there is no room for it in our relationship and that is okay.

It just sucks. I’m so happy, so proud and confident that I found my place in the universe. I found my “purpose” though I haven’t figured out how to utilize it — I will — and yet I can’t share this joy face-to-face with anyone.

The only people I can talk to about it are you, my blog readers!!

Hi!
Guess what? I’m a lie detector.
Wanna meet for lunch one day?
Yeah right!!

PAX TV has a new show!

If you are interested in lie detecting, there is a show that I have read about that is airing on PAX TV titled Lie Detector. On the show, famous people who have been in the spotlight will have a chance to take a lie detector test to sway people they are the ones being honest!

It should be very interesting!

It’s on every Tuesday at 9:00 p.m. ET. Check your TV listing for your local PAX channel.

Set your DVR or VCRs.

I plan on making it a date every Tuesday — and after the show I will post my thoughts here. I’m going to be looking for obvious signs of lying!

If you save your recording, you can go back and review the clues I see… Perhaps you can hone your lie detecting abilities!

Welcome to Spring

A crocus in my yard, close up 🙂

How’d he do that?

Last night, I was watching The Apprentice. My husband has become more addicted to the show than I am.

At the end of the show, after Stephanie was fired, Donald Trump said to Chris, a 21-year-old real estate guy from Las Vegas as he was leaving the room, that he is always having problems…”and that he better get going…FAST…or he’ll miss his potential.”

Chris was standing in the doorway about to exit the room when he stopped and listened to Mr. Trump. His upper lip lifted up for a hair of a second but he didn’t show any teeth. It kind of quivered. I immediately sensed a very threatening feeling. My heart started to pound and I felt a real sense of danger. Chris then responded in a tense voice by saying thank you to Mr. Trump. It all happened in an instant.

I immediately asked my husband if he saw it. He said no. Thankfully, we had recorded it so I played it back in slow motion and pointed it out to my husband. He still struggled to see it but after a couple of playbacks he finally caught it with my guidance. The beauty of slow motion!

I knew this expression by Chris was an expression of deep anger at Mr. Trump. It was a rageful response. Chris was boiling inside as he has done on the show many times. Except this time, he was trying to be polite and hide it because he had just narrowly escaping being fired himself. Chris knew if he didn’t hold it in – he’d be let go on the spot. Even still, he couldn’t entirely contain his true emotions. They flickered for an instant.

Expressions are a wealth of information! I suspect this what experts would call a microexpression.

Ironically, too, after Chris left the boardroom, I think Mr. Trump had a sense of this as well because he responded to George and Carolyn that this Chris guy is really volatile and needed to be closely monitored. I wonder if he subconsciously registered what I did.

I believe he did.

When I went to bed, I was thinking about this expression. I wanted to see if I could make it myself — and I couldn’t. I was flat puzzled as I continually tried to find the right muscles to move my upper lip. He moved his upper lip upwards, yet didn’t show any teeth.

It was more like a twitch — a twitch of rage!

How did I know it was even anger, I asked myself. I was puzzled. I didn’t know this expression. I don’t ever remember seeing it before. Chris didn’t act angry at all with his verbal response or his body posture.

I asked my husband if he knew what that expression meant now that he saw it, and he was clueless. He didn’t get any feelings from it at all.

I just knew — instinctively– that it was a rage of some sort: a very serious rage. Perhaps innately I knew. Perhaps I registered it subconsciously. As Malcolm Gladwell would say, it was a rapid form of cognition — a form we don’t know too much about consciously.

After trying to make the facial expressions, I realized I couldn’t. More than likely because facial experts say we can’t mimic real feelings. The muscles we use to act out fake emotions are voluntary and totally different than the ones we use in a genuine expression of emotion. Genuine expressions involve using muscles that are activated involuntary.

The closest I came to making Chris’ expression was to flare my nostrils.

Try it. Flare your nostrils.

Does it make you feel a bit angry? Negative? Perhaps mad? Do you feel your heart race a bit?

Fascinating stuff!!

Murder or Suicide?

48 Hours detailed a very interesting story this past weekend about a police officer from Wisconsin whose wife was found dead during the final stages of their divorce.

John Maloney’s wife, Sandy, was found charred to death on her living room sofa. She had what appeared strangulation marks on her neck and blunt trauma injury to her head. The case clearly pointed to murder.

The police didn’t have enough evidence however to convict Maloney so they convinced his then girlfriend at the time to try to get Maloney to confess. They wired a room and recorded Maloney interact with his girlfriend.

On the video tape you see a tense stand off between Maloney and his girlfriend. She starts questioning him — asking out right — if he killed his wife. Maloney’s adamantly denies it and his words become abusive. You feel an undeniable anger that is raging inside him. Maloney gets in his girlfriend’s face — too close for comfort — on multiple occasions. He makes you feel like he could tip over-the-brink-of-sanity several times though he never lays on finger on his girlfriend. In the last bit of tape shown on 48 hours, Maloney says that he was at his wife’s house the night of the crime. He says nothing else nor does he admit he killed his wife.

It was this tape that was the biggest blow for Maloney’s case. This is what the Special Prosecutor used to arrest and convict him.

Yet when Maloney is interviewed on 48 hours, and speaks of the crime — he stands firmly by his innocence. He swears he had nothing to do with the crime, and I truly believe him. His facial expressions are genuine and real. He shows emotions appropriately. I think this is an innocent man who has a raging temper.

The case goes to court and Maloney is found guilty of strangulation and setting his wife’s body on fire. Six years go by and then Special Prosecutor Joe Paulus, the prosecutor who tried Maloney’s case was charged and convicted of bribery and income tax evasion. That’s right, Paulus was taking money to fix cases. Cases that were fixed when Maloney was charged and convicted.

At the same time, “Sheila Berry, who had never even met Maloney, took up his cause. Berry is a part-time novelist, part-time investigator, and part-time head of Truth in Justice, a non-profit group that tries to help people it feels are wrongly imprisoned. ” (48 hours)

She uncovered a lot of evidence that Special Prosecutor Paulus never brought up in court. Not only does Berry believe that Sandy Maloney wasn’t murdered, she believed she killed herself.

“She says the evidence was in the basement of the Maloney house, where police
recorded a bizarre scene: two VCRs on top of a coffee table. And from the ceiling, there appeared to be a ligature hanging from a conduit pipe, right down in front of the coffee table.

The autopsy showed that Sandy was very drunk the night she died. Berry thinks Sandy tried to hang herself with the electrical cord: “She made a suicide attempt, at least a gesture, but enough of a gesture to jump off that coffee table and hit her — back of her head.”

Then, as Berry’s theory goes, Sandy tried to clean up in the basement shower. But ultimately, she ended up on the first floor, where she collapsed into unconsciousness on the couch while smoking. It was that lit cigarette, Berry believes, that caused the fire. “There certainly was a big death wish going on,” says Berry. “She did want to die.” (48 hours)

In support of this theory, Berry finds that police discovered multiple suicide notes written by Sandy in the garbage. Suicide notes that were never brought up at Maloney’s trial. The jury never even heard the theory that Maloney’s wife tried to commit suicide.

Berry goes on to find blood evidence to support her story. She also notes that the police were unable to find any blood evidence that linked Maloney to this crime scene. Berry believes that Sandy Maloney drank herself to death and died of alcohol poisoning. It was well known that Sandy had serious alcohol and drug problems.

Sandy Maloney had lost custody of her kids, had lost her marriage and had nothing left to live for. The following day her divorce was to be made final.

The twists and turns in this case are astonishing.

Even worse is what the defense attorney for Maloney did in this case. It was another tragedy for Maloney. He didn’t defend Maloney’s innocence with Sandy’s suicide notes. Oh no. He instead argued Maloney’s girlfriend killed Sandy. Absolute absurdity. Absurdity that helped convict Maloney if you ask me. It makes you wonder where his allegiances were at the time of this trial.

There are so many facts to this case, you can only wonder what the truth is. But when I watch John Maloney speak about this case, I believe he is telling the truth. His facial expressions are consistent with what he is saying. I get a deep sense he didn’t kill his wife.

I believe John Maloney truly deserves another trial but the current Special Prosecutor doesn’t believe John Maloney. He still believes Maloney killed his wife regardless of the new facts– and Maloney continues live out his life-sentence.

I think this a big injustice. A tragedy.