Kari Bales

When I watch Kari Bales speak out, I suspect a lot of people will likely judge her as cold and callous because we see her smile at times we wouldn’t expect it.  Kari’s husband, Staff Sgt. Robert Bales, is accused of murdering 17 Afghan civilians, including children.

Kari says without any negative emotions on her face, ““I just don’t think he was involved.” She shakes her head no and is clearly full of doubt that this could be true.

I believe Kari is in denial, which Matt Lauer talks about at the end of the interview.  Kari can’t accept that the man she loves could be capable of doing what he is accused of.  At times, she almost looks like she could crack up in laughter because its so absurd to her. It’s so over-the-top. She can’t believe it, and doesn’t want to believe it.  Understandably. Who would?

Yet in contrast, about one-third way through the interview, we do see Kari fight back true turmoil when she does tear up for a minute.  She is quick to gain composure, or MSNBC edited it here. I can’t tell.

Kari is feeling a huge array of emotions right now that I suspect even she can’t make sense of.  She is all over the board–overwhelmed emotionally, and when this happens, emotions crop up out of nowhere, as if they short-circuit. She likely will experience a flash of emotions going from sad to happy to angry in a matter of minutes. She likely won’t know which way is up and which was is down.

At this point, I suspect Kari is choosing to repress these emotions as much as she can to cope–to get by or until she can get the facts that give her confidence, and yet the facts may never give her confidence to accept the truth as she so tells us.

I think it is very natural for a wife and a mother to reject the idea her husband could be involved in such a horrible nightmare–even in the face of overwhelming evidence because accepting the truth is beyond devastating to Kari’s life. It is absolutely possible that she may always reject what her husband did (if he is convicted), because to accept her husband is a murderer is a very hard thing for a mother to do when looking at her innocent children.