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When I do not trust…

October 23, 2006/in About Me, deceit, deception detection/by Eyes for Lies

As someone who sees lies, I’ve stated before I am amazed at how when I meet people, I am positive, open-minded, and trusting.

You’d think otherwise, wouldn’t you? So would I, but I don’t. Even to my amazement.

I always give strangers the benefit of the doubt. And amazingly, I do not walk around the planet grumpy at all the lies I see. I may be sad, at times, because the lies represent an over abundant amount of troubled people, sad people, insecure people and people struggling to cope with the harshness of life, but I am never grumpy, mistrusting or edgy. I truly believe this is because I am confident I will catch a dangerous or impact-me lie when it rears its ugly head before it will seriously hurt me most of the time (Do know I do not believe I am infallible).

However, there is one arena in my life where I do not trust people. That arena is business, and only when I am the customer in the transaction!

When I meet service professionals or salesman, while I am friendly and extend a handshake, and I want to believe they are honest — I have uncovered enough lies in my lifetime to know better.

When money is involved in a transaction, YOUR MONEY, beware.

A-L-W-A-Y-S.

I say NEVER LET YOUR GUARD DOWN. Ever!
(unless it is a relative or relative of a friend — then, well maybe…)

Be warned.

People, by human nature are greedy when it comes to the green stuff. Remember, we all need it — and when you are the customer — the main reason that salesman is working is to get that green stuff: YOUR GREEN STUFF.

When you sell a car, you don’t tell the prospective buyer all the reasons why he shouldn’t buy your car now, do you? Of course not. No one does! We each have to look out for ourselves. That isn’t to say someone won’t be honest if you ask the right questions, but that’s the key, you have to know what to ask, and what to say, and most people don’t.

But there are honest salesman, you say? Yes, there are. I’d say they are less than 10%, less than 1 in 10 — maybe even less than 1 in 20. You have to work to find them.

I have seen so many switcheroos, product fact lies, warranty lies, product misrepresentations, ignorance, b.s., etc., and plain old “sorry ” lies that I could write a book! People get taken more than any of us would ever want to know. To me, it is horrifying! And even with my abilities to see lies, I’ve been lead down that garden path. When it comes to money, these guys are good!

When we don’t know someone, and we aren’t connected to them in anyway, it is much easier for them to over charge, misdiagnose, misguide, misrepresent, etc. I believe it is human nature. Yes, human nature. Even good honest people get callous over time when exposed to the sterility of business. Business is a sterile arena in our lives. We don’t see the pain we’ve caused others by intentionally or unintentionally misleading, misrepresenting, or misguiding them. The process of dishonesty, in this area, sadly doesn’t bring many consequences to reprimand the behavior.

Furthermore, businesses are sure to pass the buck when it comes to blame. We’ve all seen it. “We didn’t know any better,” “The manufacturer didn’t tell us that. Talk to the manufacturer”, and the circle of blame begins!

My solution to this problem: Do your homework–no matter what you are buying. Know the facts, find the details, and be one hard negotiator. Become the expert on everything you buy. You don’t know how many times I have done my homework, and then listened to the salesman and knew instantly that the guy was ignorant, and bullshitting his ahem-off just to make a sale!

When you do your homework, then and only then are you likely to get a fair deal, and even that isn’t a guarantee that something won’t go down after the transaction and before delivery. Even that happens more than you’d want to know. But with a little homework and knowledge, you do scare off a large majority of problems.

Don’t want to put any effort in? You’re a salesman’s best friend!!

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Renee Ellory has written this blog since 2006, dedicating her free time to help others understand people. By sharing her insights on human behavior, deception and the truth.

Many people have shared with Renee their personal stories of how her insight has greatly affected their lives. It definitely motivates Renee to continue to dedicate her time when she is available.

Renee tracked her accuracy publicly for 7.5 years, and was 95% accurate, whereas the average person is 54% accurate. She didn’t miss a case for five years sharing her thoughts before the truth was known! She is a scientifically tested and studied expert.

While she doesn’t track her cases anymore due to limited time, she still shares her opinions with the public when time allows.

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