Story of the Danish Woman Seeking Father

The video you saw of “Karen and August” is actually a hoax. It was a government ad by VisitDenmark, are you ready, to promote tourism. I can’t help but find this funny. What were these people thinking?

In the end, I think they realized they might get the wrong kind of tourists, and decided to pull the ad, but they have had a difficult time doing so. It keeps popping up on YouTube repeatedly. No surprise there.

For those of you who have interest, and wondered if the baby is hers, according to this website, it is not. You can read about that here.

There are, however, many clues to deceit in this video.

Read moreI thought it was hilarious how “Karen” (whose real name is reported as Ditte Arnth Jorgensen) totally forgets her baby’s name, and in the process laughs about it. Her laugh was the second red flag for me. I would expect her to be nervous about truly trying to find the father, but there were absolutely no sign of nerves.

Then she says about the baby, “His name is August. Yeah.” The “yeah” is indicative of deception that I have never seen written about anywhere. People who are deceptive often verbally confirm their own story, as she does here. It’s like they are thinking through what they just said, and then, without a realizing it, they say “yeah” as if they are convincing themselves. Does that make sense? She does this four or five times in this video.

“Karen” also looks like she is going to break out laughing in the beginning of this video, which doesn’t fit with the scenario. If a woman was really going to stick herself out there to do this, I would think she would really want to find the father, and wouldn’t find the situation laughable. With that, she would likely be nervous, as she would be truly hoping to do this successfully, and get the answers she so craves. I did wonder, for a second, if an honest psychopath could do this, but in the end, there were too many clues to even consider it.

I love when “Karen” says, “I was on my way home and…” At this point, she makes a question face. I don’t know how to say it any other way. Her face makes an expression, as if she is questioning what she is saying. This is another red flag. She also says, “I think you lost your friends.” She thinks? It becomes very apparent this woman doesn’t know any details whatsoever, which of course, is another red flag. Even drunk people remember some detail before they pass out.

Notice how she also swallows awkwardly? While this is not always a clue to deceit, when I see it amongst many other clues, it is supportive.

Watch her shoulder shrug when she says, “I don’t remember where you are from, or…. yeah.” I love that sentence! Two more indications of deception: a shoulder shrug and a verbal confirmation.

Then she says, “I don’t even remember your name.”

What woman on earth would be willing to put herself out there and say this? This was mind-boggling. Even if casual sex is more acceptable in Denmark, most people don’t like to admit, especially women, they were so drunk out of their mind they couldn’t remember someone’s name with whom they were intimate! Most societies have less than pleasant names for people like this, and I am sure the Danes are not exception. I laughed when I watched this, because again, I wondered if a psychopath who is being honest might do this, but of course, that was out of the question by this point.

After she says she doesn’t remember his name, she says that she does remember that they talked about Denmark. This is absolutely hilarious. Only “Denmark” sticks out with all the details this night? The person who created this video doesn’t understand the human mind.

People remember the most detail when they have an association or a connection to something. Naturally, emotions will elicit the broadest recollections of past memories. So for this woman to say that Denmark was more memorable than the guy’s name, a guy who fathered her child, is just comical.

I have to say “Karen” did quite well when she says she is not crazy or obsessive. She managed to get that smile off her face and be more serious, but then she says, “I feel I owe it to both you and him. Yeah.” Another verbal confirmation that makes no sense unless she is trying to convince herself of her story.

She continues, “I haven’t been with anyone else since that night. Yeah. Just so you know that.” There is another “yeah”, but more inconsistent would be the claim to her actions. If she is the type of woman who enjoys casual sex and drinking to the point of not remembering anything, it would be very unlikely she would have abstained from sex or drinking for a year and a half. That in and of itself makes her statement highly unlikely, even if everything else turned out to be true, which we know it is not.

I feel sorry for the people who created this. The backlash from this isn’t likely to go away any time soon.

* While there are many signs to deception, don’t forget, I believe there is not one clue that is reliable to predict deception in every case. Deception detection requires a multifaceted approach. If you show me a trait you think only liars do, I can be confident I can find you an honest person doing the same thing, so just be cautious!