I think Joran Van der Sloot really brought to the forefront of our minds that predators live among us. When we go about every day life, its easy to forget this, but after a tragedy like the one that Natalee Holloway endured, and watching Joran Van der Sloot confess with such an iron-heart, and cold spirit, it brings the vulnerabilities up-close and personal.

After Joran’s confession, many people asked me how do we protect the young girls, and women in our society? How do we reduce the chances they will fall victim to someone like Joran?

People were troubled, and without answers on how to protect themselves, and while I am not an expert on this, I do think there are several things we can do to help ourselves reduce our risks.

Read moreWe are all given two great gifts in life, the gifts of intuition and instinct. It is just too few of us harness it’s power. We, as a society, I believe are so disconnected from ourselves today, that we rarely listen to what our intuitions, and instincts say to us.

While I haven’t had the opportunity to read the book yet, I have seen Gavin de Becker talk about his book The Gift of Fear, and I did read an excerpt. I think it is fabulous. Give this book to those you love, and read it yourself. I think that is a great starting point. Encourage people to start listening to their gut instincts, and intuition more. It’s a fabulous tool we all harness within ourselves.

The second thing that I think is important is to pick a news show, or two that you find valuable and trustworthy, and watch it to keep apprised of current events on a local, and national level. This is especially true if you have school-aged children. Set up a time, and watch the news together so you can discuss stories you see with them. While I wouldn’t alert them to any particular story, I would simply answer any questions that raise their curiosity naturally. Let them discover life at their own speed. Simply provide them with information, and guidance as needed.

The reason I believe news is important is because it brings up crimes, and stories which are true, that have happened, and will help your children realize the threats that exist in society. It also keeps you up to date on the newest scams, schemes and criminal activity in your neck of the woods so you don’t fall victim yourself.

Of course, as a parent, it’s our job to inform our children that the risks are remote, and not be to afraid, but that it is important to be cautious, not to trust strangers, go with people you don’t know, or even stay with those you do if they make you feel uncomfortable.

There is something very powerful about watching true stories, and seeing real victims speak about crimes. It has a lasting, powerful effect, and I can say it impacted my childhood positively.

When a man pulled up in a car with fliers about modeling when I was a young teenager, my friend ran right to the car to grab one. I yelled at her to move away, that she didn’t know this man as I had heard of this scam before. I still wonder if my vocal action, alertness and tense body stance scared off a would-be attacker. He knew if he did anything, I’d have his description and license plate in an instant.

Next, one of the biggest sayings of society that I absolutely detest is that saying that says “Respect your elders.” While I am sure it was well intended, it has some devastating consequences. Children are lead to believe that they need to respect all elders no mater what. Those they know, and those they don’t know. This is very scary. Not all elders deserve respect. Period. Clearly, the man passing out fliers from his car didn’t deserve respect, did he?

My mother gave me the freedom as a young child to judge who did, and who did not deserved my respect in my world, and I believe this advice, and her confidence in me, actually saved me from several situations that could have turned devastating. If I didn’t have the confidence to disrespect elders, and stand my ground, I can think of several predators now looking back at my childhood who would have taken advantage of me. But because I was given the gift to think for myself, to judge people with my own instincts, I escaped while others I knew weren’t so lucky.

I can’t say it enough. We need to give our children the freedom to trust their own judgments, and to make their own decisions when they are out in the world without us. If someone makes them feel uncomfortable, they should feel confident that it is okay to sternly, and even rudely say no, and to seek help from others. It’s okay to walk out of somewhere they are supposed to be if they feel unsafe.

And last, we all need to work on accepting that is okay to not always be nice to people. Predators play on the fact we’ve all been raised to be polite to people, and to be gracious when help is offered. Most adults have a hard time saying no to stranger when they are uncomfortable. It’s a difficult thing to do, but one that could ultimately cost someone their life.

We all need to practice saying no, standing up when we feel violated, uncomfortable or threatened. It’s okay to feel uncomfortable. Embrace it as your best warning that you need to act and act now.